LinkedIn freelancing desperation

LinkedIn stands out today as the last and most hopeful place for freelancers to advertise themselves. This comes at a time when the employment of freelancers, or rather, freelance contracts, have dropped through the floor. Seniors are stuck on benches and in standing places, waiting for their turn while spiderwebs start to form on their skills and their motivation. Outside in the rain, noob juniors face a weak outlook for low salaries and short careers, before they might eventually flip burgers at McDonald’s instead.

If you cheat, cheat with dignity.

LinkedIn, with the oldest profession in mind—selling yourself—has become the arena where consultants go from embarrassing to desperate. It is no longer a lonely call for “I’m available now, my project just ended,” but has evolved into a veiled message of utter desperation. One recent example is a 50-year-old “COO” (from a tiny, four-person company) announcing that his contract just ended and that he is (cough) “enthusiastically” (cough) looking for a new gig. He does Power Automate, Python, and “lots of things.” This man had a 20-year freelance career, teamed up with some equally hard-to-employ folks, assumed the title COO, and still has to hustle for work. The message continued with pleas to spread the word, revealing how he has lived paycheck to paycheck for two decades, spent his money on gadgets, and snapped up every overpriced Apple product on the market.

Advice for him? Dropping the COO title from LinkedIn might help to make him more convincing as a freelancer consultant. His profile lists big achievements at this four-person company he supposedly leads. He appears slightly too lofty to do his work with genuine enthusiasm or real knowledge. His tiny company once had four people—CEO, CTO, COO, and an unknown fourth. The fourth seems gone, possibly fired, because that person is absent from the company’s roster.

Then there was Hassan, a young man from Egypt, hired as a “JavaScript developer” at a fairly well-known company. He was good at coding tasks but struggled with a cultural mismatch regarding interaction with women, especially in Sweden, where I met him. He liked to “accidentally” brush against women’s behinds, “Oh, sorry…,” until every woman kept a cautious distance. Swedish women stayed silent, not wanting to appear racist, but the Japanese and Chinese women in his team yelled for him to keep his dirty hands off them. He also desperately wanted a big role and a great career trajectory. Although a mediocre developer, he dreamed of promotions, business-class flights, and returning to Egypt as a success. His LinkedIn profile grew with inflated claims about leading an entire ecommerce team in Sweden. Eventually, he landed a job in the UK as a Digital Development Leader. His thoroughly embellished LinkedIn profile likely helped him climb this ladder. The lesson here is that LinkedIn is full of that kind of exaggeration.

Noob junior developers have also discovered LinkedIn as a helpful channel to promote themselves. Sometimes they have an ally who posts on their behalf, something like, “Sending a message to my network about @LindaNoob, who just graduated and is looking for a UX designer role. Anyone?” These calls can be surprisingly effective.

Meanwhile, consultant brokers, desperate to fill empty seats in their projects, send out monthly email newsletters listing the entire bench of available consultants. “Look at Petey, Full Stack Developer, looking for a gig,” followed by a mugshot. Another freelancer broker asked me if they could include me in a LinkedIn post. The whole process felt like being an expensive concubine on display, so I said no thanks. It was simply too embarrassing.

Just how low will you go to promote yourself?

LinkedIn is nonsense in many ways, even beyond these extremes. Everyone appears happy, successful, witty, and supportive of the same well-worn consensus. Things mostly stay apolitical, although I tend to unfollow or block people who get too political. The most popular subjects revolve around remote vs. on-site work, AI, lost jobs, those “I’m looking for a project” posts, and never-ending promotion of products, services, or new companies.

In summary, LinkedIn is essentially a public, global phone book. It is the “Who’s Who” of the working world—a place where everyone is self-glamorizing, building up an exaggerated career history, hunting for gigs in varying states of desperation, or seeking talent according to specific criteria. It remains important for freelancers because it’s a magnet for potential gigs. Despite all the grumbling, and the LinkedIn freelancing desperation, I have landed some decent projects from LinkedIn over the years.